The next Chapter...

I can't even believe how long its been since i last had the chance to sit down and write a post! i don't know where the time has gone, but what an amazing ride this last year has been! I have made a conscious choice to keep something to myself, in part because I have chosen to share so much with so many people; through our journey with Colin's cancer and then the aftermath for me and the boys...I have no words, for the thanks i have for a God who has walked with me and the boys through our darkest days and also led us by the hand into a new and beautiful future. Still, i stand in awe, of how my secret prayers of never wanting to be alone, and in the qualities i would most desire, if He chose for me to find someone to love again...How God can take something so painful and use it to weave this beautiful love story knocks me back to how little we are, and how magnificently HUGE our God is! Let me begin, by telling you that dating for a second time around, along with two kids, and with family and friends who are guarded and protective of us, has been a learning curve! which is a bit of the reason i chose to keep things quiet, i wasn't even sure what to say or how to form into words what it felt, to be going through this all again...i chose to make sure that God knew my heart and my deepest desires, and i trusted that HE has specifically hand-picked this special person for me and the boys. Little did we all know how it would unfold, but what a beautiful journey it has been! His name is Mike, we know each other from having been in school together since grade 7...we had always been friends, always enjoyed each other...but let me tell you, after almost 10 years of not seeing him...he grew up...into the kindest, most patient and gentle man, and his heart is one of the biggest i've come to know! I think the boys honestly, thought that he was entirely there just for them when he first started spending time with us...and the more time he spent, the more attached we all became, he fits so perfectly....but i was so guarded at first, holding him at a distance for a while, but he persued me, and he loved me, and it didn't take very much work for me to fall in love with him! there is SO much more to our story, the "little" things that God has shown us, that He has brought the two of us together...I wish i could write every detail, but Keegan won't possibly let me be on the computer that long, and i'd be here till next week, typing it all out! i have enjoyed dating...with so much more depth and richness than i ever did when i was 17 years old...to fall in love knowing the cost of losing someone, and to have the chance to fix or savour what i didn't before, has been such a precious gift! To get to have a "first kiss" again, to go out on our "first date" again, to hold his hand, makes my heart so full....to look up and feel so humbled that God would hear my prayers and allow my dreams to come true again in this lifetime is more than i can take in all at once...if i do, i can't help my be a blubbering mess at the thought of it all. What a precious gift God has entrusted to me with Mike...i am not who i was when i was married before, and i can't wait to be a wife and settle into being just a mom, and not carry this load on my own brings sheer joy in my world...to have found someone whom i connect with so perfectly yet so differently than anyone else, a best friend to share our lives with...we are beyond thrilled for this next chapter of our lives, and this next chapter begins on Saturday, THIS saturday OCtober 27th:) I'M GETTING MARRIED!!! I get to be a bride again,i get to be a wife again, and our little family unit gets to be glued back together and become whole once again! I am beyond proud of Mike, a single guy, successful in his career and his life, who would be brave enough to come into our lives, and more than step up to being a Daddy to the boys (who love him more than my words could ever say), to be patient and teach them things i could never do for them! He has courage and patience and love that i admire so much in him...i'm thankful for our individual journey's to get us to where we are at right now, and we could never have a written a better love story...God's plans are far more than we could ever ask or imagine, and there is healing that WILL come with every circumstance...and we are living proof! Can you imagine?!??! a love story written by God, Himself, my life-story, dreamed up by God, Himself! i'm still shaking my head in awe, with tears streaming down my face...all we've been through and all we have yet to experience! My wedding vows, having lived through those very vows i promised to Colin, have new meaning and come with a new level of faith and promsie than they did before.... i couldn't be more excited for this next adventure to begin, and from time to time, i will try my hardest to check in and keep you up to date! for now...a new Chapter! For those of you who have never stopped praying and encouraging us, i am beyond thankful for you...especially those who have prayed for me to find love again, and to my friends and family who have walked with me through this learning curve, who have allowed me to stumble but not fall, and walked with me along the way, opened up your arms to Mike and given him a chance to be apart of your lives as well, i'm forever grateful! i'm thrilled you will be joining us and making new memories with us in this next chapter! xox, love, Melissa