God, Continue to Lead......

I'm listening to Kathleen Carnali's "Dangerous Prayer" right now. "Jesus Rain on my parade, stripe down again, so i'm desperate for you, Jesus whatever it takes bring me to my end so i'm desperate for YOU. Amen". Wow, i'd have to agree, a painful and dangerous prayer to say the least, but an extraordinary place to be. For the last 10 months we have been on this journey of desperation for God to carry us, guide us, strengthen us, and sustain us....and HE HAS DONE THIS MORE THAN WE COULD HAVE EVER DREAMED POSSIBLE...Through most of our journey we've had clear answers, and although we've had to wait for what seemed like an eternity. We have some answers. The Doc's met Thursday and concluded that Colin has deep brain involvement of the Lymphoma, and it is right now resistant to chemo, so all chemotherapy is being stopped and we are switching gears entirely. RADIATION. This is completely unchartered territory for us to this point. All we know is that he will have full brain radiation. We have our first meeting with the radiation oncologist next Thursday (June 3rd), to find out what the treatment schedule will be and how extensive. Colin and I both cried, not from saddness, but relief. He won't have to go through any more chemo! His organs and his body can start to recover and heal, and we can pray there will be no lasting damage....OUR GOD IS BIG....we have been making it our heart's cry to trust that God is going before us through this...HE IS...He has closed doors and opened others, so we are in this comfortable inexplicable peace that we are being carried and guided, it's a safe place to be. Being able to be at home, even though the news was over the phone, was where we needed to be....HOME, to cry, hug, be distracted by the kids, just process in our own space. God knows exactly what we need, had it been earlier in the process, this would have been devastating news, but this is our next open door, and God is leading.
Since we've been home, the kids and i have been run-down and so the sickies come, just comes with having kids...God is protecting Colin, as i clean behind our sweet boys, i am in constant prayer that God will keep him here at home for as long as possible. Please pray for Colin to continue to be protected and that the kids will heal up super quick.
Home is so good, and we are laying very low for the most part, but just being altogether is the most amazing thing, i feel like each time we get to come, it feels like the first time all over again, it never loses it's beauty!
I want to say it, yet again, we so appreciate your prayers, encouragement and support, it's easy to become distracted by the everyday life and this has been 10 months and going, BUT we so need our support system behind us!!!! You are who we lean on, and we pray God's richest Blessings on you all who are still following us, and walking this with us! The beauty of the Body of Christ is an incredible place to be!!!!!
Luv, Melissa and Colin