Reflections from Colin

Lastnight I got my laptop from Medicine Hat. Glen brought it up for me so I can have a computer in my room and it sure takes away the boredom that comes with sitting in this room. I did get to see my boys lastnight and made me soooooo happy to see them. I miss so much not seeing them everyday. The chemo is easy to deal with, the nausea is easy, being in a hospital is easy, not seeing my family and especially my boys is truly the hardest thing in the world. I miss so much being able to play with Corban and now even Keegan. The joy kids bring to people is so amazing and such a blessing. I praise God though that I can still visit with them and I was actually strong enough to pick up Keegan yesterday and sit with him. It wasn't for long though because he motors now! In 4 months he is going to be running circles around me.

I love having Melissa come up and spend so much time with me, but its not the same as well. Its so hard to fall asleep in a hospital bed already and then knowing I am alone physically, because God is always there with me, is hard. Melissa and I always used bug each other they were hogging the bed, but I miss that so much too. Being in the hopsital fighting this Lymphoma has 100% truly made me realize how much I have and how much I take for granted. There are so many people in our world, in our communities who don't have anything and yet they are so grateful and happy. MAN WAS I SELFISH!

Today has been a good day for me. I had some chemo this morning but I am not feeling any ill effects from it, so that's always a plus. I feel good right now, but the nurse said my red cells were down again and I am going to get another tranfusion later today. The best part about that is it will only make me feel better! Praise God!

Melissa is shaving Keegan's head today so there goes his little surfer hair. It was so blonde from playing outside all summer and it was a little longer then the tops of his ears. He is so cute! Corban already has his head shaved to look like Daddy, even though I haven't lost anything hair yet. Melissa even said she would shave her head, but I put a stop to that.

Anyways, I should go and do my exercises they gave me to keep up my strength. Please pray over this next week that my strength stays up and also my white cells come back up so I can go to my police grad ceremony next Friday in Lethbridge! I really want to go, but mostly its upto the doc's here. I have chemo Monday, its a 24 hr, then nothing for the rest of the week, so pray my strength comes back quick. I really want to join my class on our graduation day, even if I can only go to the ceremony and not the BBQ.

To quote Bon Jovi, "Keep the faith!" I miss you all and I thank each and everyone of you for your prayers and support. I am tough guy, I know :), but everything everyone is doing for us and the prayers that are flooding in have made me cry some of the happiest tears of my life and I love each and everyone of you for that! May God bless each and everyone of your families for fighting with me!

Colin